They walk amongst us

Charmer · 02-25-2007, 06:07 PM

I walked into a Blimpie's with a buy-one-get-one-free coupon for a sandwich. I handed it to the girl and she looked over at a little chalkboard that said "buy one-get one free". "They're already buy-one-get-one-free", she said, "so I guess they're both free". She handed me my free sandwiches and I walked out the door.

> They walk among us ------ and many work retail.
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A friend of mine bought a new fridge for his house. To get rid of his old fridge, he put it in his front yard and hung a sign on it saying: "Free to good home. You want it, you take it." For three days the fridge sat there without even one person looking twice at it. My friend decided that people were too untrusting of this deal. It looked too good to be true, so he changed the sign to read: "Fridge for sale $50." The next day someone stole it!

> They walk among us.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
One day I was walking down the beach with some friends when one of them shouted, "Look at that dead bird!" Someone looked up at the sky and said, "Where?"

> They walk among us!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
While looking at a house, my brother asked the real estate agent which direction was north because, he explained, he didn't want the sun waking him up every morning. She asked, "Does the sun rise in the north?" When my brother explained that the sun rises in the east, and has for sometime, she shook her head and said, "Oh, I don't keep up with that stuff."

> They Walk Among Us!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I used to work in technical support for a 24/7 call center. One day I got a call from an individual who asked what hours the 'call center' was open. I told him, "The number you dialed is open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week." He responded, "Is that Eastern or Pacific time?" Wanting to end the call quickly, I said, "Uh, Pacific."

> They Walk Among Us!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
My colleague and I were eating our lunch in our cafeteria, when we overheard one of the administrative assistants talking about the sunburn she got on her weekend drive to the shore. She drove down in a convertible, but "didn't think she'd get sunburned because the car was moving"

> They Walk Among Us!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
My sister has a lifesaving tool in her car designed to cut through a seat belt if she gets trapped. She keeps it in the trunk.

> They Walk Among Us!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

My friends and I noticed that the cases of cold drinks were
discounted 10%. We bought 2 cases. The cashier
multiplied 2 times 10% and gave us a 20% discount.

>They Walk Among Us!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I was hanging out with a friend when we saw a woman with a nose ring attached to an earring by a chain. My friend said, "Wouldn't the chain rip out every time she turned her head?" I explained that a person's nose and ear remain the same distance apart no matter which way the head is turned.

>They Walk Among Us!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I couldn't find my luggage at the airport baggage area, so I went to the lost luggage office and told the woman there that my bags never showed up. She smiled and told me not to worry because she was a trained professional and I was in good hands. "Now," she asked me, "has your plane arrived yet?"

>They Walk Among Us!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
While working at a pizza parlor I observed a man ordering a small pizza to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked him if he would like it cut into 4 pieces or 6. He thought about it for some time before responding. "Just cut it into 4 pieces; I don't think I'm hungry enough to eat 6 pieces."

>Yep, they walk among us!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
They walk among us, AND they reproduce!

Trance97 · 02-25-2007, 06:16 PM

Some were pretty funny, but they all kinda relate to each other.

White2000GT · 02-25-2007, 06:23 PM

What, like cousins?

Charmer · 02-25-2007, 06:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Trance97

Some were pretty funny, but they all kinda relate to each other.

WHAT?! That is so wrong! Jokes that are grouped together in one post are similar in style?! The nerve!

I will never make that mistake again! Can you find it in your heart to forgive me.....???

I'm s-o-o-o-o s-o-r-r-y......

Trance97 · 02-25-2007, 06:34 PM

Lol.. No, I'm sorry. =o

Reaver · 02-27-2007, 03:29 AM

I think I've heard these types of jokes before..... OH YEAH, they are exactly like the "here's your sign" jokes that Bill Engval tells.

inferno_grl · 02-28-2007, 06:19 AM

i thought so too...

02-25-2007, 06:07 PM	#1
Charmer V.I.P User Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: The country of California Posts: 2,475 Tokenz: 1,581	They walk amongst us I walked into a Blimpie's with a buy-one-get-one-free coupon for a sandwich. I handed it to the girl and she looked over at a little chalkboard that said "buy one-get one free". "They're already buy-one-get-one-free", she said, "so I guess they're both free". She handed me my free sandwiches and I walked out the door. > They walk among us ------ and many work retail. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- A friend of mine bought a new fridge for his house. To get rid of his old fridge, he put it in his front yard and hung a sign on it saying: "Free to good home. You want it, you take it." For three days the fridge sat there without even one person looking twice at it. My friend decided that people were too untrusting of this deal. It looked too good to be true, so he changed the sign to read: "Fridge for sale $50." The next day someone stole it! > They walk among us. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- One day I was walking down the beach with some friends when one of them shouted, "Look at that dead bird!" Someone looked up at the sky and said, "Where?" > They walk among us! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- While looking at a house, my brother asked the real estate agent which direction was north because, he explained, he didn't want the sun waking him up every morning. She asked, "Does the sun rise in the north?" When my brother explained that the sun rises in the east, and has for sometime, she shook her head and said, "Oh, I don't keep up with that stuff." > They Walk Among Us! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I used to work in technical support for a 24/7 call center. One day I got a call from an individual who asked what hours the 'call center' was open. I told him, "The number you dialed is open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week." He responded, "Is that Eastern or Pacific time?" Wanting to end the call quickly, I said, "Uh, Pacific." > They Walk Among Us! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- My colleague and I were eating our lunch in our cafeteria, when we overheard one of the administrative assistants talking about the sunburn she got on her weekend drive to the shore. She drove down in a convertible, but "didn't think she'd get sunburned because the car was moving" > They Walk Among Us! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- My sister has a lifesaving tool in her car designed to cut through a seat belt if she gets trapped. She keeps it in the trunk. > They Walk Among Us! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- My friends and I noticed that the cases of cold drinks were discounted 10%. We bought 2 cases. The cashier multiplied 2 times 10% and gave us a 20% discount. >They Walk Among Us! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I was hanging out with a friend when we saw a woman with a nose ring attached to an earring by a chain. My friend said, "Wouldn't the chain rip out every time she turned her head?" I explained that a person's nose and ear remain the same distance apart no matter which way the head is turned. >They Walk Among Us! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I couldn't find my luggage at the airport baggage area, so I went to the lost luggage office and told the woman there that my bags never showed up. She smiled and told me not to worry because she was a trained professional and I was in good hands. "Now," she asked me, "has your plane arrived yet?" >They Walk Among Us! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- While working at a pizza parlor I observed a man ordering a small pizza to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked him if he would like it cut into 4 pieces or 6. He thought about it for some time before responding. "Just cut it into 4 pieces; I don't think I'm hungry enough to eat 6 pieces." >Yep, they walk among us! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- They walk among us, AND they reproduce! __________________ When I post, please don't read; I have no idea what I'm saying!

02-25-2007, 06:16 PM	#2
Trance97 You only live once.. Join Date: Dec 2006 Location: Saint Paul, MN Posts: 3,822 Tokenz: 6,461	Re: They walk amongst us Some were pretty funny, but they all kinda relate to each other. __________________ Last edited by Trance97; 02-25-2007 at 06:24 PM.

02-25-2007, 06:23 PM	#3
White2000GT V.I.P User Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Virginia Beach Posts: 3,454 Tokenz: 384	Re: They walk amongst us What, like cousins?

02-25-2007, 06:34 PM	#5
Trance97 You only live once.. Join Date: Dec 2006 Location: Saint Paul, MN Posts: 3,822 Tokenz: 6,461	Re: They walk amongst us Lol.. No, I'm sorry. =o __________________

02-27-2007, 03:29 AM	#6
Reaver V.I.P User Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Right behind you Posts: 1,174 Tokenz: 384	Re: They walk amongst us I think I've heard these types of jokes before..... OH YEAH, they are exactly like the "here's your sign" jokes that Bill Engval tells. __________________ <)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))# "Yeah, that dood looks like he will eat the cookies, fuck yer mom, break the milk glass and stab yer pops with it" --Boomer

02-28-2007, 06:19 AM	#7
inferno_grl Member Join Date: Feb 2007 Posts: 61 Tokenz: 122	Re: They walk amongst us i thought so too... __________________ go to http://www.tektek.org/dream/dream.php if you want a avatar like mine... or pm me and i'll make you one... hehe... check out this one of my new bf... ain' t he cute? except the tools.

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